Cold. New York. Raining. Fall.
That was the time of year it was
He was running through the street in it.
in his old Adidas sambas that were torn up
he saw an open store where he could go get dry
he hadn't realized that he went into a footlocker
he went over to the converse section
there on the shelf was an awesome pair of converse
he was a dollar short when the cashier rung it up
he was crushed because he loved the shoes
than the cashier says "it's ok I'll cover for you"
his face lit up like the fourth of july and thanked the cashier
he ran home to his house in the Bronx in his new shoes
when he got home his mom said "I see you have a new pair of converse"
he replied "I don't have a new pair of shoes, I own them"
good writing has nice flow
ReplyDeleteI like the story you told, you did a good job of describing whats going on. I would like to see the picture that you wrote about.
ReplyDeletei liked how you made your poem into an everyday life situation, and is somehting so realistic.
ReplyDeleteThe last line made me smile. Also I like the "his face lit up like the fourth of July."
ReplyDeleteYou have written this very gracefully with a good flow.
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ReplyDeletegood writing, has nice flow
ReplyDelete